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Post by Mfitz804 on Sept 7, 2020 18:40:31 GMT -5
My 13 year old has asked me to teach her how to play guitar. I play about 95% by ear, but I figure I can teach her the notes, open chords and of course the power chord, which will let her play some songs that she likes relatively quickly.
However, she’s having some difficulty getting her fingers spread enough to get her fingers on the appropriate frets. A lot of that is her arm and wrist position, which I keep correcting. But she can’t hold the 1st and 3rd finger on frets with a space between.
Obviously a lot of it is muscle memory and practice, but I was curious if anyone had any suggestions on how to get her fingers a bit more stretched out? Is it as simple as “just keep doing it”?
I know a smaller scale guitar would probably help (she’s using my Robert Cray Strat), but we’re not investing in equipment until she demonstrates that it’s something she wants to stick with.
I haven’t taught anyone in 25-28 years, so any help is appreciated.
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Grizbear-NJ
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"I'll do the BEATING around here"
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Post by Grizbear-NJ on Sept 8, 2020 11:01:37 GMT -5
Boss-Man; you are in an interesting position right now. I am going thru a similar thing with my nephew. (Regarding drums of course) I honestly don't know if my ability to read music, helps or hurts when he asks me a question.
He does most (if not all) of his playing by ear (like you); so sometimes I think I get too "technical" when I explain or show him a drumming technique followed up with a detailed explanation of "why" it's done that way. Something as simple as "Which hand do I lead off with?"; can lead into a detailed discussion of "style & technique". My point in operating that way, is to give him a solid "foundation" to start with, and to let him progress at his own pace.
After I retired, I started taking Bass Guitar lessons; primarily to expand and improve my sight reading. I found a College Level, Professor of Music to teach me. I quickly discovered the Pro's & Con's of that move; I was amazed at what I didn't know or just flat out misunderstood.
The professor teaches Jazz & Classical guitar; he also teaches Music Theory & Music Composition at the College. He operates his own private school, (where I go), and has done session work with a number of notable artists. For all practical purposes, he is the real deal.
At our lessons, I am constantly picking his brain for other info besides bass guitar. His musical experiences are a never ending treasure for my learning and expanding. I'm one of those characters, that once I learn a "technique", I want to know the "how & why", so I can apply it to a real life situation.
The reason I mention all this: Once you see that your daughter has a definite interest in guitar (or any instrument); and you take her as far as your ability allows. Do not hesitate to find people that can help her get even further along. You just might "unlock" the musical genius in her.
Good Luck my friend!
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Post by Mfitz804 on Sept 8, 2020 13:20:37 GMT -5
The reason I mention all this: Once you see that your daughter has a definite interest in guitar (or any instrument); and you take her as far as your ability allows. Do not hesitate to find people that can help her get even further along. You just might "unlock" the musical genius in her. Good Luck my friend! Thanks for the advice! It has been a common theme for my daughter to not really pursue things, like learning to roller skate, ride a bike, etc.. It's quite obvious when she doesn't have the interest to proceed. My theory was exactly what you said, I can teach her a certain amount of stuff, including hopefully a few easy songs that she likes, because that keeps one's interest. Ultimately I suspect this will not be something she pursues (up until maybe a year ago she was constantly saying she never wants to play an instrument, although she has been a singer since age 4), but for the time being, I am happy to try to show her when I can. We did try once before and she didn't have any real interest. Her interest seems more genuine now. There will come a time where I am out of my depth and then she can take lessons if she wants to. But I suspect being able to bang out a few power chords and play along to a Green Day album or something like that will probably be the limit of her interest. |
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Grizbear-NJ
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"I'll do the BEATING around here"
Posts: 217
Age: 71
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Post by Grizbear-NJ on Sept 8, 2020 17:15:50 GMT -5
Good approach! Open as many doors as possible for her, to let her see what's out there; but let her take the steps to walk thru the door. You may be surprised with the result.
The change of "interest" issue is not uncommon for a teenager. You know your daughter, I'm sure there will be other issues to contend with also as time progresses. If she is interested in singing, she will probably want an instrument as accompaniment.(solo work) If she becomes interested in songwriting; that will lead her down a different path.
Regardless: be prepared to be thrown under the bus at some point in time, for an action you did or did not take to help her. It is inevitable; I've got the tire tracks on me to prove it.
Again: Good Luck!
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Post by Peegoo 🏁 on Sept 8, 2020 21:46:54 GMT -5
Arm position greatly affects how easily a player can open their hand to more easily play. Pulling in the elbow makes it very difficult. Try having the guitar in the classical position (in the lap, not on the leg), with the neck pointing upwars about 40 degrees and the fretting-hand elbow away from the body. Like this: ![]()  |
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Post by Mfitz804 on Sept 9, 2020 11:36:27 GMT -5
Her arm position was definitely a problem I kept correcting. That position does make sense, I will give that a try.
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Post by rickyguitar on Sept 14, 2020 3:20:22 GMT -5
Boy, I wish I could help. My daughter wanted me to teach her to play. We bought her a guitar, nicer than I intended but she HAD to have the 1 with all the inlay. I had her I would teach her the notes on all the strings (1st position), then chords and she could start playing songs. We did not make it through all 6 strings. I play that guitar now, glad I got the nicer one.
Its funny, when she was little she wanted to play piano. We got a spinet and she could stand there and pick out simple melodies all by herself. Got her a piano teacher who turned out to be a nasty old bag. Totally turned her off to it. Viola was next, about a year. And come to think of it when I was not able to get her going on guitar we got lessons for her. Guess it was just not her thing. She can draw and paint amazingly well. Has 2 degrees, works at CDC. Just not a musician. Good luck.
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mikem
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Musician soundman musician soundman
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Post by mikem on Sept 17, 2020 17:15:35 GMT -5
I'm a retired public school music teacher.
My kids both played instruments and sports.
They would much rather had just played sports (fun'n games) but after seeing our high school's top 10 students annually being members of the HS orchestra or band we wanted to hedge our bets and have them study music.
They played their sports (travel teams, club teams, school teams) but also practiced their instruments 45 minutes to an hour a day - five days a week.
They both finished in the top 10 their senior year - go figure.
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Post by K4 on Sept 26, 2020 1:15:29 GMT -5
Well after going through "virtual" school for the last month or so. I have found it is not possible to properly teach your kid, grandchild. They will never give you the respect they give a "teacher",even if you know more than the said person. Get her some proper lessons and when she asks you for advice, you will be there.
I never home schooled my own kids, so this may not be true. I was harder on my kids than I am on my grandkids.
I told a teacher, I have a new respect for your profession.
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Post by K4 on Sept 26, 2020 1:32:06 GMT -5
My Son and his wife have come to the same conclusion with my grandson. Indianna.
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Post by modbus on Sept 27, 2020 20:59:17 GMT -5
I'd say just keep at it, it'll come eventually, but you could always throw a capo on the 5th fret and viola! Your Cray strat is now a short scale guitar.
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Post by LTB on Oct 7, 2020 0:28:33 GMT -5
About 18 years ago my daughter wanted an electric guitar and amp. We went and picked an inexpensive amp and guitar and I was really wanting to teach her but never could seem to get her interested. She said she would teach herself. A few years later I found out the real reason she wanted them was when she had guy friends over who played. Boy was I ever Duped!
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MoJoe
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Post by MoJoe on Dec 14, 2020 13:41:23 GMT -5
If that's still of concern:
Regarding the fingers, a classical nylon string guitar is making life easier for beginners. If not, may be capo the strat to make pressing down as easy as possible and she can relax a little while focusing on that dreaded spread. And what Peegoo said. May be even use a footrest. And keep checking she doesn't cramp. Show her comfy chords first, E, A ,D (?)*
Concerning didactics, I'd go with the campfire chords just as you've considered and learn simply structured songs to sing along with, Neil Young, Bob Dylan etc. *(Cortez the killer)**
When strumming along with tapping the beats and chord changes in time are happening move on to broken chords and more rhythmical finesse.
With arpeggios coming into the picture let her find little melodies within the chords, connecting one to the other, and train the ear for minor/major feel.
Voilà, she can play with friends. First base.
From there start splainin a little theory on the where, what and why.
**Remember thats in DropD. 🙂
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matryx81
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Post by matryx81 on Dec 14, 2020 13:46:27 GMT -5
Depending on where this goes, perhaps bass may be a better choice?
(I say this as a guy who tried guitar briefly around age 14, only to discover that it would be much more work to be like Andy Summers than what I had the patience for. I realize your daughter may not be aiming for that, but some of the mechanics of bass are less frustrating than guitar can be.)
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