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Post by jazzguy on Feb 21, 2024 23:23:29 GMT -5
Anybody experience this?
Ask a question, maybe about something on ebay and get zero response.
I'm assuming no response = "no" for an answer these days.
Yesterday some guy lowballed me by less than 1/2 my asking price on a Craigslist item, but I felt obligated to at least answer him.
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Post by Taildragger on Feb 22, 2024 0:07:28 GMT -5
I find it particularly annoying when the specifics provided by the auction description and accompanying PICs don't constitute adequate information on which to base a rational decision. In such cases, when I've subsequently asked questions (the answers to which might allow me to "fill in the blanks") I assume that "no response = 'oops: I been busted'", at which time I move on.
I also assume that, had my questions been answered, the information contained in those answers probably would have caused me to follow the same course of action.
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Post by Lesterstrat on Feb 22, 2024 1:54:49 GMT -5
People are flakes anymore. I get all varieties of flakes almost weekly with my business (custom fishing rods). Just this past Sunday, for example, someone contacted me via FB messenger asking if I did repairs. Yup, I sure do. “Great, I’ll call you tomorrow!”
I’m still waiting on that call. As I said, I get that kind of crap at least once a week. It just comes with the territory.
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Post by ninworks on Feb 22, 2024 7:12:26 GMT -5
I have a craigslist ad about repairing off-road motorcycles and ATVs. People contact me often about fixing something they have and I never hear from them again. There's probably a 50/50 chance, or less, I'll ever have someone actually show up with their equipment. Most of them don't even ask how much the repair will be so it's not like they think I'm too expensive. Any time someone says they are bringing their machine to me I always have them text me when they leave their house because I won't wait around all day for some flake to show up because there's a pretty good chance they won't. I'm not staying home all day waiting for someone if I have things that need to be done away from home. If they text me when they are leaving their house I can usually be home before they get there.
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Post by Leftee on Feb 22, 2024 8:51:57 GMT -5
In my mind this is the new norm. It’s all about me.
“I had a thought about acting in your ad. So I contacted you. And you replied. Then I thought some more and decided that I don’t really want that. So I just let it go. I don’t even think or care that you’re expecting my call/text/email or to actually show up. That’s because this has always been about me. How do I know (or why do I care) that you are actually a real person like me?”
Absent is the once-common courtesy we enjoyed in society.
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Post by slacker 🐨 on Feb 22, 2024 9:43:22 GMT -5
If you say you're bringing something over (to sell, repair, whatever), you show up or you contact the person to let them know. That's just common curtesy.
I was selling a couple bikes and had a guy say he'd be over to pick them up at 4:30. We had dinner plans at 6, so not problem, right? Well, by 5:45 he was still a no-show, so we left for dinner. He was really irate when we weren't there at 7 when he finally arrive. Not sure how it is that people think you're just at their beck and call these days.
It's a strange new world.
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Post by slacker 🐨 on Feb 22, 2024 9:45:44 GMT -5
Also, we go through this with my son and texting. I've gotten to the point where I only text him for things that are not important. If we're supposed to pick him up and text that we'll be there at 5, he doesn't respond. One time it's just that he didn't think he needed to, another he says he never got the message.
Now I just call....but my wife will still text and then we're sitting outside his place waiting for 10 minutes only to find out he fell asleep and didn't see the message.
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Feb 22, 2024 11:10:29 GMT -5
Whenever I have sold anything on CL or Reverb I made it clear that my stated price was what I was willing to sell it for. I despise haggling but some people just don't get it, even if I say "for a penny less I'll just keep it". Non-responses seem to be common these days, whether it's a sales transaction or follow-up on a bid from a contractor. I had a string of contractors come out to do repairs after the ice storm here and just ghost me. I rather get an honest "it's just not worth it to me" response than a non-response. This kind of stuff goes beyond common courtesy and enters "personality disorder" in my book.
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Post by slacker 🐨 on Feb 22, 2024 11:15:40 GMT -5
Whenever I have sold anything on CL or Reverb I made it clear that my stated price was what I was willing to sell it for. I despise haggling but some people just don't get it, even if I say "for a penny less I'll just keep it". Non-responses seem to be common these days, whether it's a sales transaction or follow-up on a bid from a contractor. I had a string of contractors come out to do repairs after the ice storm here and just ghost me. I rather get an honest "it's just not worth it to me" response than a non-response. This kind of stuff goes beyond common courtesy and enters "personality disorder" in my book. We had a tree fall on our house from a storm last August. I was amazed at how many contractors came out to do a bid, spent 30-60 minutes surveying the damage, then never responded with a quote. |
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Post by Taildragger on Feb 22, 2024 11:34:10 GMT -5
That's just common curtesy. Now "uncommon"... |
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Post by Seldom Seen on Feb 22, 2024 14:47:40 GMT -5
Discourtesy must be contagious. It seems this has become the post-Covid norm and has happened to me with frustrating frequency. I’ve speculated that it is a social side effect of forced isolation.
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Post by Leftee on Feb 22, 2024 15:08:57 GMT -5
I dunno. I think we’ve been sliding down this slope for quite a while now.
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Feb 22, 2024 15:29:40 GMT -5
Observe how people navigate these days, on the roads and in public. Tethered and texting, Facetiming through the supermarket, speed walking with cell phone on speaker like they're in the landing party and urging Scotty to beam them up. Clunky interactions like they've never learned how to walk among their own species, wonder if the person is talking to you or on bluetooth, noise-canceling headphones that screams "eff-off world." If you step back and look at it you can't deny something has dramatically changed in society, and it isn't for the better.
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Post by ninworks on Feb 22, 2024 15:34:18 GMT -5
Also, we go through this with my son and texting. I've gotten to the point where I only text him for things that are not important. If we're supposed to pick him up and text that we'll be there at 5, he doesn't respond. One time it's just that he didn't think he needed to....... If I am expecting a text message I will respond as soon as I can when I see it and I'll be watching for it. If I want an immediate response to anything I will call the person. To me, texting and email are things to be used at my convenience not yours. I expect nothing more from anyone else. Telephone calls were and still are the medium for instant responses. If a text message doesn't require a response to a question or something needs either affirmation or denial, that's one thing, but if you send me a text message that is nothing but some kind of statement I may or may not answer it. Again, if you want or need a quick response call me. I have better and more profitable things to do with my time than hover over my phone. It's a tool. It doesn't put a roof over my head, clothe, or feed me. |
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Post by Taildragger on Feb 22, 2024 16:09:47 GMT -5
I saw something I could use in the "free/curb alert" section of our local CL about a month ago. I e-mailed the guy to get the address and after receiving his reply (the address + "I put it on the lighted, covered front porch since it's now dark and raining") I replied to say "oh: that's near where I am, I'll be there in 10 minutes".
I went and picked it up and, when I got home, e-mailed him to say, "OK: got it, thanks...you can take down the ad". He then e-mailed me back to say, "you're among the top 1% of CL-ers!!!"
That kind of surprised me, but I guess no-brainer, common courtesy on CL actually has gotten that uncommon.
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Post by LTB on Feb 22, 2024 18:07:19 GMT -5
We were just giving away a large credenza on Next Door Neighborhood. A person who wanted it for their mother said they wanted it and asked for our phone number. They were to pick it up around 5pm the next day. We were going to dinner after they left. We waited until 7pm and gave up and went to eat. They did not give me their phone number so I got on next door neighborhood and posted to them. They replied, my husband decided not to get it. NO CALL? REALLY?
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Post by Seldom Seen on Feb 22, 2024 20:35:50 GMT -5
Discourtesy must be contagious. It seems this has become the post-Covid norm and has happened to me with frustrating frequency. I’ve speculated that it is a social side effect of forced isolation. When do you think it began and was there a root cause or defining moment? I’m curious because I really built my consulting business on responding swiftly, completely, and effectively. I practically beat it into those under my charge. I retired in early 2020 and can’t remember many issues before that. |
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Post by Leftee on Feb 22, 2024 20:45:50 GMT -5
The pandemic certainly made it worse. But I’d seen plenty of examples of ghosting prior to that time. Not showing up for job interviews. Not showing up for the first day of work… with no intention of ever showing up.
I think mores have eroded with each passing generation. It’s been a slow slide until recent years. Now it’s an avalanche.
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Post by Seldom Seen on Feb 22, 2024 20:48:18 GMT -5
^I meant to quote Leftee’s response to mine.^
I continue to amaze myself!
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Post by LTB on Feb 22, 2024 20:50:26 GMT -5
The pandemic certainly made it worse. But I’d seen plenty of examples of ghosting prior to that time. Not showing up for job interviews. Not showing up for the first day of work… with no intention of ever showing up. I think mores have eroded with each passing generation. It’s been a slow slide until recent years. Now it’s an avalanche. I am so glad for many reasons, this being one (dealing with people on a daily basis), an increase of companies using A.I. to monitor their employees, but mostly just I am tired! |
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Post by Leftee on Feb 22, 2024 21:25:06 GMT -5
^I meant to quote Leftee’s response to mine.^ I continue to amaze myself! I knew that! |
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Post by RufusTeleStrat on Feb 22, 2024 22:20:33 GMT -5
Observe how people navigate these days, on the roads and in public. Tethered and texting, Facetiming through the supermarket, speed walking with cell phone on speaker like they're in the landing party and urging Scotty to beam them up. Clunky interactions like they've never learned how to walk among their own species, wonder if the person is talking to you or on bluetooth, noise-canceling headphones that screams "eff-off world." If you step back and look at it you can't deny something has dramatically changed in society, and it isn't for the better. This is not just young people. I see people in Walmart holding the phone in their hand yelling at it, complaining that they other person need to speak up. Its a phone put it to your ear. Also holding it that way in the car is not hands free either. The other annoying thing is the people who wear huge headsets and sing to the music they alone can hear. First of all if you were that good you would not need to do it that way, you would be in demand to sing at things like the superbowl. You are not that good.
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