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Post by roly on Mar 20, 2021 4:36:44 GMT -5
I think there will be a need for a penalty for moving too fast.
What other rules should we adopt?
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Post by Riff Twang on Mar 20, 2021 4:39:39 GMT -5
I guess we better leave our canes and walking frames outside the combat area.
Penalty for dislodging someone's eyeglasses too.
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Post by gato on Mar 20, 2021 5:20:14 GMT -5
Illegal to pull on ear hair.
Allow 45 seconds to get up after being thrown to the mat
Recalculate the weight classes: 150 lbs is now flyweight (rather than 105 lbs)
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Post by Sharkie on Mar 20, 2021 7:34:12 GMT -5
No mouthpieces needed. Just take your teeth out. 😬
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Post by Leftee on Mar 20, 2021 7:37:16 GMT -5
No mouthpieces needed. Just take your teeth out. 😬 You beat me to it. See what I did there? No doping (use of Ben Gay, Bio-Freeze, etc). |
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Post by Mfitz804 on Mar 20, 2021 7:59:53 GMT -5
All matches have to be on one or the other’s lawn. Winner is whoever successfully gets the person off their lawn.
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Buster
Wholenote
Posts: 213
Formerly Known As: Buster Strings
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Post by Buster on Mar 20, 2021 8:18:53 GMT -5
Time outs for bathroom breaks.
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Post by gato on Mar 20, 2021 8:20:11 GMT -5
Time outs for bathroom breaks. Or changing of Depends |
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Post by Peegoo 🏁 on Mar 20, 2021 9:14:16 GMT -5
Saturday Evening Special Feature Competition:
Rascal Scooter demolition derby!
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Mar 20, 2021 9:29:22 GMT -5
Illegal to pull on ear hair. Or nose hairs. |
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tmc
Wholenote
Posts: 911
Formerly Known As: tmc
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Post by tmc on Mar 20, 2021 10:13:44 GMT -5
Catheter whipping your opponent is forbidden.
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Post by Leftee on Mar 20, 2021 10:16:45 GMT -5
Catheter whipping your opponent is forbidden. That counts me out. |
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 20, 2021 12:26:23 GMT -5
No hitting below the belt...in other words, below the nipples.
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 20, 2021 12:32:14 GMT -5
•No blinding opponent by throwing Metamucil dust in his eyes.
•No distracting opponent by calling out Bingo numbers.
•No Bocce Balls in the ring.
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Post by Leftee on Mar 20, 2021 12:53:34 GMT -5
If you’re down, no fair using your Life-Alert.
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 20, 2021 13:24:45 GMT -5
If you’re down, no fair using your Life-Alert. "He's kicked my ass...and I can't get up!"
(variation on a theme)
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 20, 2021 13:28:10 GMT -5
•Combatants must refrain from pelting opponent's corner men with stewed prunes between rounds.
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tmc
Wholenote
Posts: 911
Formerly Known As: tmc
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Post by tmc on Mar 20, 2021 14:58:24 GMT -5
The "sleeper" hold is limited to 5 seconds due to the potential of old man smell poisoning of the opponent.
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 20, 2021 15:35:06 GMT -5
•Any combatant attempting to momentarily stun his opponent with acoustic feedback from his hearing aid will be immediately disqualified.
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Post by Peegoo 🏁 on Mar 20, 2021 15:45:57 GMT -5
Two minutes is the maximum timeout permitted for a Meals on Wheels delivery.
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Post by roly on Mar 20, 2021 17:06:41 GMT -5
If it was a "pro" wrestling club.....canes and walkers would be legal.
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Post by Mfitz804 on Mar 20, 2021 18:04:13 GMT -5
Not everyone who competes gets a trophy, but everyone who competes and doesn’t break a hip gets a trophy.
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Ragpicker
Wholenote
I'm playing it in a different key
Posts: 339
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Post by Ragpicker on Mar 20, 2021 18:09:53 GMT -5
MMA does the A stand for avoidance ?
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tmc
Wholenote
Posts: 911
Formerly Known As: tmc
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Post by tmc on Mar 20, 2021 18:35:07 GMT -5
Between rounds, the card girl circles the ring with posters of Medicare supplement plans.
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Post by Leftee on Mar 20, 2021 20:00:08 GMT -5
Early bird dinner break at 4:00.
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 20, 2021 20:22:28 GMT -5
Victor wins first in line at the buffet and a year's supply of Geritol.
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