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Post by Auf Kiltre on Mar 17, 2023 10:32:56 GMT -5
My wife and I have been married for 39 years and spent most of that time dog owners. The last one has been gone now around 6 years and I still get the old man sniffles thinking about her. We've been living the pet ownership life vicariously with the granddoggie, a little mental case Weiner schnitzelhund. Last weekend "Boo" (short for Boudin) must have gotten into something nefarious at an Airbnb and it was touch and go for a while. He seems to be improving, thank God. Just chatted with my brother and his eldest of 3 dogs, a German Shep may be facing his last weekend. Just doesn't seem that long ago we were watching his ridiculous puppy ears standing up.
I just can't go through that again. Age and our own end dates also now being a factor. Maybe time to start hanging around dog parks to get my fix.
Anyone else come to this stage? I know all the justifications of rescues, etc. But, nope. Hurts too much.
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Post by snakeboy on Mar 17, 2023 10:40:21 GMT -5
Sometimes I think the world would be a better place if dogs and humans swapped life expectancies.
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krrf
Wholenote
Posts: 376
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Post by krrf on Mar 17, 2023 10:55:17 GMT -5
My wife and I have been married for 39 years and spent most of that time dog owners. The last one has been gone now around 6 years and I still get the old man sniffles thinking about her. We've been living the pet ownership life vicariously with the granddoggie, a little mental case Weiner schnitzelhund. Last weekend "Boo" (short for Boudin) must have gotten into something nefarious at an Airbnb and it was touch and go for a while. He seems to be improving, thank God. Just chatted with my brother and his eldest of 3 dogs, a German Shep may be facing his last weekend. Just doesn't seem that long ago we were watching his ridiculous puppy ears standing up. I just can't go through that again. Age and our own end dates also now being a factor. Maybe time to start hanging around dog parks to get my fix. Anyone else come to this stage? I know all the justifications of rescues, etc. But, nope. Hurts too much. I'm going through this with my parents to a degree. They always had small dogs, but the last little guy they had passed away late last year. Both my parents are in their upper 70's; I gave them friendly advice that maybe it'd be easier to go petless from here on in or at the least adopt a senior dog. They informed me they went out and got another puppy. Some people think they will live forever I suppose! My wife and I have cats and we decided no more after this. On an upside, I know you can always get volunteer hours at most shelters dog walking, so maybe that's the answer!
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Post by Leftee on Mar 17, 2023 11:04:54 GMT -5
We have our last cat now. He's a wonderful little beast. He actually talks to you when you call him by name. And he comes when he's called. But I'm allergic to him. And the cat hair all over the house is a constant nuisance. Then there's the litter box.
We have a little dog and he's pretty cool and a good boy. But when he passes I wouldn't mind going petless for a while. I think the freedom would be nice. At least for a while.
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 17, 2023 11:10:58 GMT -5
How about fostering shelter dogs? True, there will still be the sadness of separation when they get adopted, but at least you have the consolation that they go on living, albeit not with you.
Another option would be to volunteer at your local shelter (if it's a "no kill" shelter). You get the contact, but not the strong bonding that sets you up to be devastated.
Neither is a perfect solution, but few things are once you reach our age bracket.
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Mar 17, 2023 11:13:20 GMT -5
The freedom of being petless is undeniable. The things my wife and I shared as a trio with the pooch (cottage vacations) are long gone.
When we lived in our 55+ community in Florida we were youngsters compared to most residents. It was a pretty common sight to see elderly women in their night gowns dragging a dog behind them unaware the pooch was pooping on the sidewalk or in the street. Pretty sad reality and the likely precursor to community postings of elderly dogs needing a home.
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Mar 17, 2023 11:15:47 GMT -5
As far as fostering dogs, volunteering at shelters, I commend those who do such a thing. But I know my wife. She bonds with dogs in about 3 minutes (and they with her) and it wouldn't end well.
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Post by Seldom Seen on Mar 17, 2023 11:52:57 GMT -5
I think I’ve written it before but I’ll write it again. I can’t stand the “losing them” part of pet ownership. We have an old cat and I’ll be devastated when he passes. My son lost his amazing dog this winter and it still weighs on us. My daughter and her hubby have two dogs. One of them was taken in after her half-brother died. Losing that dog will crush everyone. I can’t bring myself to commit to another pet at this point in my life but I’ll never say never.
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 17, 2023 11:56:17 GMT -5
As far as fostering dogs, volunteering at shelters, I commend those who do such a thing. But I know my wife. She bonds with dogs in about 3 minutes (and they with her) and it wouldn't end well. Always a danger for "dog people". Have a buddy whose wife volunteers at the shelter. They fostered a dog...and wound up adopting it themselves.
"Best laid plans of mice and men" and all that...
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Ryder
Wholenote
Butterscotch Blues
Posts: 856
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Post by Ryder on Mar 17, 2023 12:00:56 GMT -5
I've had dogs all of my life. I'm 73 and my present dog is 9. We've decided he will be our last.
My main point is, I don't want to die before my dog. I hate the thought of leaving him without me. I know that could happen and I can't do anything about it but to me, the human, I just don't like the idea at all. I know dogs don't think like we do but just the same....
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Post by Ragtop on Mar 17, 2023 12:20:23 GMT -5
I've made that long last drive twice, and both came home with me to be buried in the backyard. Two rescued terriers, and both lived to be 17+ (consecutively). Both were "my" dogs, although they loved my wife too.
This guy we've got now is "her" dog, and the love between them is something to see. He's a blue-eyed Aussie, and too smart for his own good.
I really don't want to be around when his day comes. If that makes me a coward, then so be it.
Okay, enough of that....
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Post by Leftee on Mar 17, 2023 12:24:42 GMT -5
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Post by Chauncy Gardner on Mar 17, 2023 12:28:39 GMT -5
The last one has been gone now around 6 years and I still get the old man sniffles thinking about her. We've been living the pet ownership life vicariously with the granddoggie, a little mental case Weiner schnitzelhund. I just can't go through that again. Hurts too much. Our last golden joined all of the other pets at the back of the pasture over 10 years ago, it was too much, so many great times and memories with our family. Granddoggie has been filling in and we are getting too attached to her, but no more for us in the near future.
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Mar 17, 2023 12:55:36 GMT -5
😄😔😢 It takes something "extra" in our hearts and minds to reconcile the parting. More than just plodding on. Some displace the loss with another pet, that's ok. I personally find it takes something deeper. Maybe that's the pet now offering us a lesson in life after their timeline has ended.
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 17, 2023 13:00:24 GMT -5
I really don't want to be around when his day comes. If that makes me a coward, then so be it. I hear ya. We're both 74 and our dogs are 7 and 9 years old.
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Post by zoikzz on Mar 17, 2023 18:23:57 GMT -5
Currently 65 with a 14 yr. old Morkie and 2, 1 yr. old kitties. Not always getting along but beautiful and special pets to us. Love them " Get Back"
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Post by rickyguitar on Mar 17, 2023 22:48:40 GMT -5
I am 68, wife is 64. Our German Shepherd is 2. Last year I had to have our 10 year old English Mastiff and am still struggling with it...but I do not want to he dogless.
Edited to say had to have mastiff put to sleep.
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Post by Peegoo 🏁 on Mar 17, 2023 23:36:04 GMT -5
I am right there with you. I am a doggiedog freak, and love 'em all. I've been dogless for the last 10 years, and although there are some days I miss coming home and hugging a big fluffy dog, but I have to be realistic. My lifestyle would be completely unfair to the dog, leaving it alone for more than 8 hours a day. That's just selfish to my way of thinking. Lucky for me, however, I have lots of friends and neighbors that have dogs, so I can get a doggie fix and recharge my batteries. I do miss having a dog...every day.
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Post by Taildragger on Mar 18, 2023 10:40:07 GMT -5
Dogs are the best people, really.
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Post by Lesterstrat on Mar 18, 2023 10:58:57 GMT -5
Like Ryder, my wife and I have both had dogs our entire lives. But, when our Poodle Ginger died a few years ago (she was almost 16), we decided against getting another. We'll never say never, but neither of us are interested in getting another at this time. As much as we both love dogs, we've found we enjoy living vicariously through out daughters (we have twins), and their family dogs. One has two Huskies and the other has two Pomeranians.
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Post by K4 on Mar 18, 2023 11:13:33 GMT -5
My mother is 83 and last year got a puppy. Best thing she ever did. She is much happier and she is a generally happy person. She and her husband take the thing to the dog park 3 or 4 times a day, so the pup is well exercised and happy also.
Personally I like Dogs but have no desire to take care of one.
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Post by slacker 🐨 on Mar 20, 2023 10:45:25 GMT -5
I've lived my whole life with dogs and cats. We lost two cats and two dogs within 18 months about 4 years ago. That was really hard. We decided to not go right out and find new friends, but then we had a series of events that led to us getting a dog and two cats.
With the dog, a couple years ago my daughter called to tell us her co-worker had puppies looking for a home. It was a mixed breed, exactly the type of beast we would want. The funny part is that both my wife and I, independently, had looked around at puppies available in the area (even though we had agreed to go dogless for awhile). We were both ready and the puppy was amazing. She's grown into a fantastic dog that we love dearly.
A year later I'm driving to work. We live in city limits, but on the very edge of town on a road that just chip sealed with ditches on the side (looks like "out in the country"). Someone had dumped some cats...two adults (male and female ) and two 3 week or so old kittens. Again, fortuitous as two of my kids were seriously thinking about getting a kitten. I took them home thinking, at a miniumum we'd keep them long enough for the kittens to be weened. Ultimately, each of the two that were thinking kitten took one. The two adults were clearly bonded. When I tried to put the male in the car the day I found them, he resisted massively. I took the female and kittens, that were in a box, and put them in the car. Then the male went in very willingly.
We knew if we took them to a shelter, they'd be separated. We decided to keep them. Again, amazing cats that we love dearly.
Hopefully we'll be in our 70's by the time they are all gone, so we'll have to think about what we want to do at that point.
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Mar 20, 2023 11:12:13 GMT -5
When my mom passed in 2012 we found a very emotional note she left us all in the event of her death. She ended the note with "please be merciful to my cat!"
None of us were in a good position to take on Oreo, an aged Tuxedo. Life conditions, other pets that could present a danger to the cat, etc. My brother with the biggest dogs took him in. They dedicated a spare bedroom to him and furnished it with cat structures, etc. Everyone spent time interacting, scheduling free roam time when they put the dogs out, etc. He actually seemed to flourish for a while. Oreo lasted 6 months to the day from my mom's passing, then suffered a catastrophic stroke that left his hind legs paralyzed. It was then they decided to send him to mom.
Always a tough epilogue 😔
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Post by hushnel on Mar 20, 2023 12:05:50 GMT -5
Dogs should have longer lifespans, “they are man’s best friend”. I’ve had 3 in my life. A Beagle, a Standard Apricot Poodle, and a mix breed that was an amazing animal. The Beagle had to be put down in it’s old age, heart breaking, the Poodle was stolen, bastards, the mixed breed was maybe my favorite, I let him go with a family that sold me a mobile home in a park that didn’t allow dogs. The selling family was moving to a large farm in northern PA and offered to take Layla with them, they loved Layla, super intelligent, and I let her go to a better home.
Dogs are heart breaking at the end, still the pain of the loss is worth the company. Dogs are very dependent on us, it’s in their evolution, they are pack animals, social and loving.
I have a cat now, no doubt he loves me. He is very indépendant and able to survive without me. Smokey was rescued off the streets of Homestead FL, obviously his mother died, he was too young to be on the streets and was rescued by a friend that lived at my wife’s house.
When I arrived at the farm house in North Central FL. with all my belongings, I found him pinched against the wall of the trailer. I freed him and he jumped out of the trailer sat down and started grooming himself.
At that time either rats or squirrels were in the attic, it sounded like they were playing basketball. A day or two later nothing, dead silence. It’s been that way for 12 years now. Every once in awhile I find a dead rat just in front of the steps to the house. The Squirrels are on the property but don’t come anywhere near the house, I don’t see them dead. Smokey will leave his trophies just in front of the steps to the house. He won’t mess with snakes either. Certainly cats love us they just aren’t dependent on us.
I can be gone for weeks, neighbors feeding him for me, he easily lives outdoors while I’m gone, if the weather gets nasty he’ll go under the house, if it’s really nasty for days he goes down to the 1,600 sq. Ft. concrete work shop. I’m not sure how he gets in but it’s not a problem.
Smokey is the first cat I’ve ever had. His life style and mine work fine for us. He’s getting older and spends more time inside now than previously. He still prefers to stay out at night but if I bring him in he’s fine sleeping at the end of my bed.
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Mar 20, 2023 12:54:30 GMT -5
Smokey will leave his trophies just in front of the steps to the house Ahh yes, the ultimate gift a cat can bestow to their subjects. I did have a yellow lab that brought me a mouse once, but it required her to puke it up at my feet, lol. Cats and dogs, so different but both great animals to have around.
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Post by hushnel on Mar 20, 2023 13:04:50 GMT -5
I’ve never had both at the same time but I’ve known a few were the kitten and puppy are raised together. They get along fine and are pretty funny when they are playing. Dogs have better patience, but when the cat is in a playful mood it’s hilarious.
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Mar 20, 2023 13:13:43 GMT -5
Our son has the Dachshund (Boo) and a Bengal cat (Bingi). The cat is the patient one and tolerates Boo's constant playful attacks. I'm certain in a real brawl the Dachshund wouldn't fare well. But despite Boo's insufferable foolishness Bingi was clearly concerned and hovering when the dog got sick. It was a sweet scene, actually. Fortunately whatever ailed the dog seems to be improving.
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Post by Leftee on Mar 20, 2023 16:12:45 GMT -5
Maybe Boo is allergic to cats.
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Post by Auf Kiltre on Mar 20, 2023 16:35:40 GMT -5
Nah, we're pretty certain he ate something bad at the airbnb. But I could totally see a cat poisoning, murdering or gaslighting a dog with impunity, lol.
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michael
Wholenote
Recent Retiree
Posts: 620
Age: old enough to know better and not care
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Post by michael on Mar 20, 2023 19:50:57 GMT -5
again, i thought I'd replied to this but i don't see it. i'm not sure what happens...
anyway, i've always been a dog guy and very few times have not had one. we've always had a bunch here on the farm since people know we have dogs, they dump them out and the dogs end up here. we find homes for as many as we can, but the rest sort of end up living here. keeps me broke providing food and meds for them.
anyway, animal control around here got better and it slowed down a lot. through attrition, we were down to one old lab/pit mix. i don't know for sure how old he was, doc said maybe 15. he'd been with us for years and had outlived a bunch.
he passed from cancer and i wasn't going to get anymore. that lasted a couple years. now i have a tightly wound, easily triggered border collie/rottie mix that is bipolar! and 75 lbs! i take her out on a leash to protect the world and even though she's been trained, she decides whether or not she's going to behave or not. a lot of times she deliberately disobeys me.
but her sweet side makes up for it most of the time.
she could outlive me. her live span and my statistical life span will end about the same. just in case, i've arranged with my very best friend and sparring partner for 20 some years to take her if she does. he's here all the time and they get along great. she loves him... he's great with dogs and i trust him. you learn a lot about a person when you're trying to beat each other up. he's a 5th degree black belt and i'm just almost a 1st... he could kill me any time he wanted to but hasn't so far ....
but this IS the LAST!!! so help me!!!
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